People are complex especially when under duress. I am always reticent to give simple answers to difficult questions. Not because there are never simple answers that suffice, but because it often shows a lack of respect for the person in need of help. Before you dive in and offer guidance to someone, it’s important you […]
Leadership is an interesting topic. We all seem to think we know what it is and can identify when it’s lacking, but often have different definitions of what it means. It gets even more challenging when you have different sides with competing agendas/world views clashing with one another. Recent events in Baltimore have put a […]
Leadership is not for the faint of heart. It certainly has its ups and downs and can test anyone’s emotional fortitude. However, this is the very reason so few people can do it well. If you take every small slight and failure personally, the job will eat you alive. Whenever you assume a position of responsibility, you automatically also assume a roster of critics and malcontents who aren’t always aligned with your leadership vision. Since you can’t realistically fire everyone who disagrees with you (nor is this advisable), then you need to figure out other ways to handle the pressures and scrutiny.
Today I received some very disturbing news. It was information that would make anyone angry. There is nothing worse than betrayal especially when you have a long history with someone and have trusted them. It never ceases to amaze me how people will rationalize their behavior and not take personal responsibility. The fact is that actions do have consequences and sadly there is often collateral damage to an individual’s behavior that can linger a lifetime and affect many people. A pebble will cause a ripple in the ocean whether the act is good or bad – it is important to always remember this.
I often worry about people who read too many self-help books and/or set lofty expectations for themselves based on what others think or espouse. Many of these books or speakers attempt to create and communicate a common definition of success and/or happiness that resonates with everyone and is applicable in all situations. They also tend to engender flawed comparisons of reality and potential. It’s almost as if who you are doesn’t matter and that everyone is equally capable in all situations and that there is a proven recipe for managing all life has in store for you.
Too often in life we respond to situations the way we think we should rather than expressing our true feelings. We build up walls around our emotions to prevent others from seeing our personal vulnerabilities. It’s sad but most of us have grown up believing that our emotional reaction to something is either good or bad rather than part of being human.
Not only does journaling provide you with an opportunity for daily reflection, it also serves as an outlet for your feelings about what is taking place in your life at any given time. Instead of keeping things “bottled up” inside, you now have a vehicle for emotional release (which is always the preferred alternative).
You get to choose your mood. It doesn’t choose you. Sometimes this may be more work than you’d like, but it is almost always the truth.