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What My Dog Taught Me

January 3, 2011

What My Dog Taught Me

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Unfortunately, over the holidays, I had to put my 13-year-old dog to sleep. It was an incredibly sad but necessary decision. I am glad that I had the opportunity to end his suffering and say goodbye in a loving way, and acknowledge him for all that he has meant to me. I believe that the words of comfort and the affection shown by my son and me at this exceedingly difficult moment made a difference to him and were the proper way to end his beautiful journey, respecting our relationship.

I have only ever been a “dog” person when it comes to pets. They are a unique animal that enhances our positive traits and imparts valuable life lessons. There are three things that “Buddy” and his predecessors have taught me: 1) the power of unconditional love; 2) the importance of loyalty and trust in our relationships; and 3) managing the inevitability of grief and loss in life.

I can only speak from personal experience, but I have found that dogs always love unconditionally. If you are their owner, they don’t judge who you are and are always happy to be in your presence. It doesn’t matter if you leave for five minutes or five days; you get the same sadness when you depart and a warm reception every time you return. Whether you’re in a bad mood or feeling sad, they will do their utmost to cheer you up. If you are sick, they will lie at the foot of your bed and do their best to provide their own form of comfort. When good things happen, they immediately notice your positive energy and want to share the joyful moments with you. In short, they are always there for you without judgment.

There are no more loyal and trusting animals than dogs. They will willingly give their life to protect you (and other family members) and not even think about it. They are always on the lookout for your best interests and assessing the people you bring into your life. I’ve found that they can be excellent judges of character. They will gladly stick by your side and eagerly look to you for guidance and direction. They may not always be perfectly obedient, but somehow, they know when it’s important to pay attention and listen. They rely on you to make the best decisions for them and to care for them. They trust you to do the right thing for them and respond accordingly.

Lastly, I’ve always believed that a pet is nature’s way of preparing us for the temporal nature of life. All relationships have a beginning and an end, but few typically begin and end with you as the key element. You are there for them as a puppy, at their peak, and in their old age. You also have the power to decide when it is time to ease their suffering and say goodbye. The arc of the relationship is comparatively short from a time perspective, but usually profound in terms of the connection that is created. I find it sad that many times it is the fear of losing someone that often triggers people into mending fences. We know we’ll outlive our dogs, so we make the most of the time we have together.

I am incredibly sad to no longer have Buddy as a part of my life. He has been an essential part of my world for almost fourteen years. During that time, he has been a constant source of love, loyalty, and support. If we could all learn certain relationship cues from our pets, our existence would be significantly transformed. If we loved those closest to us unconditionally, we’d feel safer in those relationships and be more authentic. If we believed that these same individuals consistently supported us and remained trustworthy, we would be more inclined to reciprocate, leading to the dissipation of many of our inherent fears. We would also be better equipped to handle any adversity that comes our way. Finally, if we treated each interaction with our friends and family as if they truly mattered and would end one day, then maybe we wouldn’t get caught up in much of the “tit for tat” nonsense that permeates most long-term relationships and hinders our capacity for true mutual understanding and loving kindness.

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