Leadership Thought #203 – The Grass Isn’t Always Greener…

Funny thing about clichés is that the reason they stand the test of time is that they are usually true.  Oddly, even though we all know this, individuals continue to fall into the same traps.  I cannot tell you how many people I have seen make unwise professional and personal decisions out of desperation or for the wrong reasons.  It is almost as if they are grasping at straws and hoping that by blowing something up, they will end up with a better reality.  It will definitely be different, but not always better.  In fact, the consequences of their decisions often result in significant collateral damage because life isn’t lived in a vacuum.

In my mind, there is something to persevering and hanging in there.  There are no quick fixes to deep issues.  Life can be hard work at times, but it is usually worth it.  The question you have to ask yourself is, “Are you willing to do the work?”   If not, the same negative patterns will reappear and may even bring worse consequences with them.  Happiness does not come from something external, but from what’s inside.  You have to be happy with yourself first; otherwise, EVERYTHING else will fall short.

I don’t subscribe to the theory that there is a perfect job or spouse or lifestyle.  I worry that our generation has started to jump into things too quickly only to find out that we cannot handle the ensuing challenges or commit to anything substantial long term.  If it’s acceptable to bail out when the going gets tough, then that’s the route people will take.

I urge you to step back and reconsider before you change jobs, switch careers, end your marriage or long-term relationship, walk away from your financial responsibilities, uproot your family, cut people close to you out of your life, or buy more things you can’t afford.  In all these situations, consider the common variable contributing to your unhappiness.   It’s you.   Instead of blaming others, maybe it is time to work on yourself.

  • Are you willing to look in the mirror and honestly assess the part you played in getting here?
  • Is the current situation salvageable?
  • If so, what would it take?
  • How much would you grow and learn if you stuck it out?
  • How much stronger would your bonds be if you were able to persevere and work it out?

There are few worse emotions in life than remorse and regret.  Chasing rainbows is a fool’s errand, but successfully navigating the emotional roller coaster of life is a real and self-affirming activity. Try and remember that the grass isn’t always greener.  In fact, the other side of the fence is unchartered territory and there is a high likelihood that all the green you see is a bunch of weeds hidden well by someone else

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